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Here is the link to the real post: ‘Chemtrails,’ Ron Paul, and the Cost of Conspiracy in Arizona

Please peruse it, enjoy it, and comment profusely…the finished product reads exactly as it should (due to Mr. Swindle’s exacting editing skills)…nothing needs to be added, and nothing needs to be taken away….

But there is, in most posts, stuff that ends up on the cutting room floor that is kind of fun and witty, and you sort of enjoy it – almost like the rough heel of the bread smeared with butter and honey…it isn’t good enough for the discerning reader, but it does have its charms, and you would really prefer to keep it out of the trash can, at least for awhile.

So here is a peek at the original postscript before it gets consigned, once and for all, into the rusty, clanky, and offensively scented garbage receptacles – no, over there – in the right-hand sideyard of the mind….


About 30 miles southwest of Sedona, just below the summit of Mingus Mountain,  four Paulite Acolytes fan out, awaiting the impending carnage. 

It is dark all around. The SORPS (Soldiers of R. Paul) are united only by their black stealthy clothing, walkie-talkies, and sense of outrage. They communicate fluently via a series of Aboriginal tongue clicks – because you never can tell who might be listening.

They know, as only a few others do, that there is a secret underground U.S. Military base in the nearby town of Cottonwood; it is from here that the nearly-silent helicopters and jets come, issuing forth night after night, to slowly annihilate the reasoning abilities of John and Jane Doe, Americans. 

The Mission, as always, is not to interfere (How un-Dr. Paul-like that would be!), but to collect data – to accumulate and amalgamate enough evidence to bring the rotten-to-the-core Military-Industrial Complex to its knees once and for all.

Although the duty is dangerous (think about it, people!), there is a sense of honor and Esprit de corps among the volunteers – they know that any night could be the tipping point in the battle against the Huns of War.

A slight vibration is felt from within the mountain and out in the surrounding sky; it is almost unnoticeable, but our  veteran spotters know it like their own heartbeats – the Cavalry is coming! The clicks escalate – the enemy will be here soon – but what an honor, to be here, in this time and place, during the battle for the collective soul of human-kind!

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Here’s the hot link:

And for your gustatory pleasure, a sampling from the main course:

Dad, religion is mostly a crutch. Scientists know that, and you should too. Anyone who takes it literally is just stupid.

OK, my boy, let’s try this another way. Let’s say all religion is just kind of daft, but it gives comfort to people, so if they want to worship, they can. What would you think of a religion that denies other creeds (not to mention atheists and agnostics) the right to exist? That dictates that all unbelievers must be killed!

That’s a load of crap, Dad. The Bible says the same stuff. Hardly anyone takes it seriously. Do you really think most Muslims want to kill Christians, or Jews, or anyone else? Ninety-nine percent of the Muslims in the world just want to have a peaceful life and get along with other people. So why would you interfere with their right to worship?

I don’t think I’ve said I wanted to do that, Nicky. I’m just saying that this “religion” that you seem to find so benign is actively involved in killing people all over the world who won’t succumb to its tenets. Therefore we need to be wary. People who speak out tend to have problems.

Christianity is the most violent religion in history, Dad. What about the Crusades?

Well I think it depends on who you talk to on that one, and besides, why do you keep bringing up such ancient history? What about 9-11? What about the terrorist attacks that take place every single day worldwide?

Dad — those people are lunatics. Just like the guy in Norway.

I’m not sure the Scandinavian Slayer is Christian. He might say he is — but his actions don’t really fit in too well with the New Testament. And he is one person. One twisted and evil individual. These others are actually following the instructions in the Koran. There’s a huge difference!

I’ve heard Begunga Mike might be making another appearance over at the Lifestyle section soon.

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And the winner is:

Granny Danger! (My Sainted Mumsie.)

Of course I’m ecstatic that one of the MOST EVIL MOTHERFUCKERS TO EVER WALK THE EARTH is dead…who isn’t? In fact I hope he’s being raped by Beelzebub and the boys as we speak…and I know he will have all of eternity to experience the torment of every creepy penetration device in Hell’s mighty arsenal.


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Yup….And really, who else could it be? The Norwegians? (Oops, they were Muslims, too. So sorry!) The three fat guys in Kingman who still worship at the altar of Timmy McVeigh?

Of course not. It is the Muslims, you idiot, which is why Chairman Peter T. King (R, NY) and the House Committee on Homeland Security began hearings on Thursday. (more…)

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I’m not sure why Jamie Glazov and Joseph Klein thought it right to recently savage our ecumenical, Big-Tent-For-All-Religions friend, Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf, but it’s a good thing the bloggers at Care2 were around to set them straight.

How else were we to find out what a sympathetic, multi-layered individual the Holy Man really is?


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It must have been the cute puppies.

I mean, everyone knows that women are suckers for the big round eyes of a baby animal – it must bring out some kind of hard-wired maternal chemical that men don’t possess in any kind of quantity.

Why else would a very Conservative lady friend of mine send me a Christmas e-card from one of the most morally obtuse organizations on the planet, Care2? She had to have been hypnotized.

Actually I am glad she sent it – because all you need is one view of this whacked-out leftist website to understand what happens when reason is sublimated to world view…the pieces don’t fit together very well…it’s a smiling soccer-mom trip to intellectual hell.


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I’m not sure why certain e-mails seem to recirculate on the internet, sometimes years after their initial appearance, but recirculate this one has: I’ve found the following video link in my inbox several times in the last week:

The clip, from 2007, is more or less an opinion piece from Fox News’ John Gibson regarding Somali Muslim hectoring for Sharia Law concessions in the frigid state of Minn-ee-soh-dah.

Now I don’t know much about Paul Bunyansburg other than the fact that it seems to produce some pretty unbalanced characters (not to mention some really foxy snow bunnies), but, nevertheless, I thought it might be interesting to see if the push to institute Islam in America had any traction, three years later.


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I enjoyed, just a little bit, some of the hand-wringing prior the Koran-burning escapade that wasn’t.

Why even Sarah Palin weighed in, Facebooking the following call to Christian restraint:

“I would hope that Pastor Terry Jones and his supporters will consider the ramifications of their planned book-burning event. It will feed the fire of caustic rhetoric and appear as nothing more than mean-spirited religious intolerance. Don’t feed that fire. If your ultimate point is to prove that the Christian teachings of mercy, justice, freedom, and equality provide the foundation on which our country stands, then your tactic to prove this point is totally counter-productive.”


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My ex-wife is a wonderful person, even though, like me, her feelings tend to get hurt easily. Slights, once felt, are never forgotten…and in fact they grow in intensity with the passage of time.

Years and years ago – well before we were married – I made the mistake of telling her she wasn’t “smart” enough for me. I think I meant it in a book sense – because she is definitely way more intelligent than me in many ways, especially when it comes to judging certain people’s overall lack of sincerity and their willingness to try to damage her or her children.

Back when I was in her good graces, she used to extend the same watchful eye towards my relationships with others, warning me numerous times to stay away from this or that so-and-so, and to keep tighter control over my mouth – because “some day” it was going to get me in trouble.

Of course I didn’t listen, and of course “some day” came, unfortunately more than once…but at least she tried, huh?


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